10 Things Your Blogger Won't Tell You...

1. "Hardly anybody reads me."

I KNOW no one reads me.


2. "The more companies pay me, the more I like their stuff."

Shit.... if I could get a company to pay me to talk about their schwag, I'd make love to their stuff.


3. "Did I mention I'm not a real reporter?"

I'm not a real reporter.


4. "I might infect your computer with a virus."

Not unless blogger.com gets infected.


5. "I'm revealing company secrets."

Ain't no secrets from my company that I could pass. I think.


6. "Just because my name's on it doesn't mean I wrote it."

Do you READ the shit on this blog? Do you think anyone else could/would write so bad?


7. "My blog is just a stepping stone to bigger and better things."

Puhleeze.......


8. "I can control what you see on the Internet."

I couldn't care less what you see on the Internet, I'm not your mom.


9. "Blogging just about ruined my life."

Not as much as my outstanding student loans almost did....


10. "I'm already obsolete."


Declaring yourself obsolete implies that you were relevant at some point in the past. I don't think that's a concern here.